BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We're playing this week with Luke Burbank, Helen Hong and Peter Grosz. And here again is your host at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.
(APPLAUSE)
PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Thank you, Bill. In just a minute, Bill pays tribute to his favorite gorilla Harhymbe (ph) in our Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924.
But right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Luke, Londoners and subway riders, everywhere really, are frightened and even outraged at a new program encouraging people on the London Tube to do what?
LUKE BURBANK: Is it to bring a box with a variety of ferrets in it and then....
(LAUGHTER)
BURBANK: ...Do a small ferret circus while the people are trapped on the Tube. And then ask for money at the end.
SAGAL: That would be a great program. Have you ever seen that? Have there been a ferret circus in any subway you've been on?
BURBANK: No. But I feel like it's ripe for the picking as an entertainment option...
SAGAL: It is. No, some opening prompts might be, hello, what book are you reading? Is that seat next to you empty? Is it wet?
BURBANK: Oh, wow. They want people to talk to each other?
SAGAL: That's exactly right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: They want people to talk to each other.
HELEN HONG: That sounds terrible.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: The program is called Tube Chat.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Which, actually, when you think about it, sounds like a competitor to Tinder.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Anyway, this organization, somewhat mysterious, no one knows who they are, they're distributing badges you can wear that say Tube Chat. And that supposedly encourages strangers to talk to you instead of sitting in silence.
PETER GROSZ: This Brexit is really messing with their heads.
SAGAL: Yeah.
(LAUGHTER)
GROSZ: I feel like they have just gone completely unhinged. Like, just do what all crazy people do.
SAGAL: They're talking to people on the subway, ah.
BURBANK: I don't want to get too locked into sort of gender normative stuff or ideas about how men and women tend to behave. But I can promise you that 100 percent of the people volunteering to be Tube chatters are dudes.
(LAUGHTER)
BURBANK: Zero percent volunteer rate among the women of the Tube riding people.
GROSZ: They have a thing that says, please leave me alone, Tube chatters.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Well, reaction to this program has not been good. These are all real quotes from London commuters, quote, "if a stranger in a badge tried to talk to me on the train, I'd probably start crying."
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Quote, "the worst thing about Tube Chat is they haven't considered the rest of us who'll have to listen to it happening."
(LAUGHTER)
GROSZ: And, our favorite, quote, "the day I willingly talk to someone on the Tube is the day I have to tell someone that their hat is on fire."
(LAUGHTER)
BURBANK: Huge problem in the U.K.
SAGAL: Peter, a new study finds that people are more likely to believe in God after they do what?
GROSZ: Have really great sex.
SAGAL: That's exactly right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL, LAUGHTER)
GROSZ: Is that really right?
(APPLAUSE)
HONG: Wow.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Having sex leads to a tendency to believe in God. That's why all the atheists you meet are so tense.
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GROSZ: What do atheists say during sex? Oh, there's no God. Oh, there's no God. Oh, nothingness.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: According to researchers at Duke University, sexual intercourse is linked to belief in God. Whether it is a benevolent, loving God or a cruel, vengeful God, well, that depends on how long you've been married.
(LAUGHTER)
GROSZ: Or a non-existent God if you've been married long enough.
SAGAL: Apparently, the connection occurs because sex releases a chemical in the brain that makes our sources more susceptible to religious belief. And also because hey, if somebody like you could get lucky, maybe there is a God.
(LAUGHTER)
GROSZ: It does actually, like, prove that God exists in a way because he's, like, hey, I made that.
SAGAL: Yeah.
GROSZ: You like that? That was pretty good. One of the best things you've ever done? I made that so there'd be more of you. I made that so good that you'd have to keep doing it. In order to keep being a species.
BURBANK: I love that in your mind God is a dude that your mom dated after the divorce.
(LAUGHTER)
BURBANK: Like, he drove an IROC. He's trying to buddy down with you.
GROSZ: Hey, Petey, was going on? I don't really care. Listen, your mom and I are going to be out all night.
(LAUGHTER)
GROSZ: You can - you know how to microwave stuff, right, buddy? Great. Also I'm Billy D. Williams. I don't know if you knew that.
(LAUGHTER)
GROSZ: I'm going to take your mom to cloud city. She truly belongs with us up here in the clouds.
(LAUGHTER)
GROSZ: You know...
HONG: That took a weird turn.
(APPLAUSE)
GROSZ: You know your mom and I actually met because I talked to her on the subway. She was very, very recipient.
(SOUNDBITE OF THE O'NEILL BROTHERS SONG "TAKE ME TO CHURCH") Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.